Mr Brightside
by lyricsinmotion
Summary: AU no curse: Emma comes to town and meets Killian, the local bartender, and they become quick friends. It isn't until Emma takes a job as deputy to Sheriff Graham that Killian begins wondering if friendship is really all he wants with Emma. Heavily inspired by Mr. Brightside by the Killers. Has Gremma and Captain Swan. Warning- angst ahead.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Let me just start with Holy Crap Tumblr I hate you and your feels. Okay. That's better. I saw a completely random post today that brought back a ton of memories regarding the song this story is named after, and I began thinking of story lines- tons and tons of story lines- for cs. So I started writing...And this happened. If you're familiar with the song Mr. Brightside by the Killers- which, please tell me you are- then you probably have some sort of idea where I want to take this story. I don't know how long it will be, but probably between 6-8 chapters. I am really excited for this, mainly because I have issues and love writing angst, but still. If you don't like angst- consider yourself warned. This is AU so Graham is still alive, but there is no curse. While some of the context from this chapter is from the pilot, I own nothing. All rights to the show. Enjoy!**

_Destiny is calling me..._

Emma leaned over her counter and stared at the little cupcake, candle lit with hope of a better year. With a deep breath she closed her eyes, realizing regardless of what she wished for it wouldn't come true- it never came true. For 27 years she'd sat, closed her eyes, made the same damn wish, and blown out the candle. And every year, she waited for it to come true.

Not anymore. She wouldn't hold out hope for a stupid dream anymore- she had no family, and it was time she realized that. Without making a wish, she blew it out once and for all. This would be the year she let herself live her own life without the thought of having a family. It was a hopeless dream anyway.

That was when she heard the knock on her door. She walked over to it curiously, wondering who it would be. When she opened the door to see a small boy, she felt her eyes widen as she swallowed. The hell kind of joke was this supposed to be?

"Um…Can I help you-"

"Are you Emma Swan?"

Emma looked at him while narrowing her gaze. "Yeah, who are _you_?"

He seemed to hesitate, just a little in his answer. "My name's Henry. I'm your son." Emma pulled back a fraction of an inch, working back the years in her mind. This kid was, what, 10? She's 28 now, and god that means Neal was how many years ago….

_Fuck_.

He walked inside her apartment like he owned the place, Emma calling after him. "Woah- Hey- kid- kid- _kid_! I don't have a son!" she yelled. She couldn't be sure after all- it was so long ago. Who's to say she even remembers if it was a boy or not?

Except it _was_ a boy.

"Where are your parents?" she asked.

"10 years ago, did you give up a baby for adoption?" he asked. Emma's shoulders sank and the air left her lungs. So he really was her son. How could this be happening- she even marked the little box saying she didn't want to be contacted, _ever_. How did he find her? "That was me." _Yeah, no shit Sherlock I got that part._

"Gimme a minute." Emma left the room and took a few deep breathes, reminding herself that this kid probably just wanted to meet his mom. Simple as that.

Somehow the stupid kid managed to get her to take him home. God, he was so much like her that even she couldn't win that argument. He definitely was hers. It was a long, confusing drive that Emma wanted over- now. The kid kept talking about his mom and how she was out to get him and he thought if he found his birth parents they might be able to take him in so he wouldn't have to deal with Regina- his mom's name- ever again. Emma tried blocking his voice out but she couldn't- the kid talked just like…

No- she wasn't going to think about him. When the kid asked about him, she told him he died like a hero. He seemed to like her answer, and Emma felt glad that she'd protected her son- wow, weird- from his father. It wasn't that he wasn't a good man- aw hell, who was she kidding he was a thief for crying out loud. She just didn't want this kid getting his hopes up about a dad that would never show up and be the father he wanted.

When they arrived in the small town of Storybrooke, Maine, they drove straight to his house. It was huge- an older white home, fit for royalty. She pulled up and told him it was nice to meet him and all, but she wasn't a mother.

"Yeah, you are!" he told her. "I'm your-"

"Son, yeah got it. Look kid," she said. "I can't be who you want me to be." He gave her his signature puppy eyes- she'd seen them so much that night she'd taken to calling them his signature look. That was when the front door to his home opened, and a very upset woman barged out.

"Henry! Where were you- get out of that car right now!" she called after them.

"See what I mean- she's unbearable!" he whispered to Emma. She couldn't help but crack a smile. This kid had everything she ever wanted for him- a family- and he still managed to think he deserved more. Thing was, the more the kid talked the more she agreed- this kid deserved the moon. He was amazing, but she knew he'd never really be hers; not that she wanted him to be.

"Excuse me- what do you think you're doing with my son?"

"I'm not your son!" he yelled while jumping out of the car and past the woman.

"He found me- my name is Emma. Look I'm really sorry- I never wanted this to happen, but I'm his-"

"Birth mom. Yeah, I guessed as much. But you didn't answer my question." The woman cut straight to the point, she had to give her that.

"He showed up at my apartment in Boston- what was I supposed to do? Say, 'Sorry kid but find your own way home'? Even I know that's not a good idea," she told the woman.

"Yes well…" The woman paused. "Well, I suppose you're right. Thank you for bringing him home. Now goodbye," she said with an edge in her voice. "Come on Henry let's get you inside," she told the boy while walking away, Henry calling after Emma to save him.

"Bye, Henry," she said in a sad voice. God, she needed a drink- this was just the perfect ending to a grand day. _Well, this is one for the books,_ she thought to herself.

She drove the quiet streets, wondering if in fact she could get a drink around here. When she saw a hidden little bar called The Hook, she pulled over immediately, thankful that someone in this place understood alcohol was a necessity everywhere.

* * *

**A/N: Reviews are much appreciated, especially this early in my writing! Thanks for reading :) **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: I don't think you understand how hard this story hit me. I don't think I've ever written this fast- and if you've followed any of my other stories you'd know this lol. I'm really excited for this story though, and I'm really happy with this chapter and how it's turned out. You finally get the first meeting here- I hope you like it! While this is AU, some things will very much be the same. Neal is still part of Emma's past. Milah is still part of Hooks.. **

**Thanks to everyone who has already followed/favorited this story! I love you! **

_I'm coming out of my cage and I've been doin just fine..._

Killian wiped down the counter while humming along with the music. It'd been so long since he'd let himself let go, and for once in his life he was doing just that. Four years ago he moved from his big city life to this little town- a decision based off a rather rocky event he preferred not to think about. He'd always wanted a bar, and he saw the opportunity to start over by buying the run down place near the town line. It took 8 months to get it up and running, but it was worth it. The Hook was the most popular bar in town- or rather, it was the only bar in town- but it was still popular.

It was only recently that he'd really begun living his life again, and he knew part of that was because of the boy. A few months ago, a young man wandered into his place claiming he was running away from home- 'he'd had enough.' The kid's name was Henry, and Killian really took to him. Somehow the boy managed to break Killian from his stupor he seemed to be entranced in for the previous few years. See, the problem was this girl. It was always a girl though, wasn't it? She'd broken his heart- shattered it really- and he never really recovered. He'd lasted 6 months in that city before realizing he was always looking over his shoulder, wondering if she'd be there. So he packed up and moved- but it didn't help. Not even opening a bar helped, not much anyway. But the kid- he helped.

And Killian hadn't a clue why.

He'd chalked it up to being an empathy thing- Killian had run away when he was young, and he supposed he empathized with the kid's lack of will power to put up with his adoptive mother anymore. Killian's parents were distant at best for most of his childhood, up until the point when his own father walked out on them. That really did a number on his mom, and it was downhill from there. One day, it was all a bit much. So he walked. And he saw that look in the kid's eyes- the one only a few people Killian had encountered truly had. The kid knew what it was like to be surrounded by people that 'loved' him, but feel completely and utterly alone in the world- and so did Killian.

Being around Henry had helped him deal with the issues he had with his parents- he realized he'd harbored resentment for the way he'd been treated growing up, though he really shouldn't have. He didn't have it bad; neither did Henry. But the both of them had this feeling of abandonment- Killian from his father, and Henry from his birth parents. It was a strange bond they'd formed, but it made them happy- a feeling both needed more of. So Henry came around a few days during the week after school and the two would just talk- about anything, really. The kid didn't have any sort of father figure, and Killian had sort of filled that role for him in a manner of speaking.

That was how he knew Henry was tracking down his parents, though he'd never dreamed the kid would actually go out and find them. That seemed a bit dramatic, even for him.

The bell rang on the door then, and Killian forced himself out of his thoughts as he looked up.

_Damn_.

The woman had long blond hair, lightly curled, and wore little make up if any. Her dark jacket was tucked close to her body to shield her from the cold but it couldn't hide the red dress she wore underneath that hugged her in all the right places. She smiled sheepishly at him and said, "Sorry, are you open?"

He gave her a smirk and replied, "Darling, if the light's on we're open." She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and walked to the counter to sit down. "What'll it be, lass?" he asked while grabbing a glass from the shelf.

"Uh…" She looked around before sighing and putting her head in her hand, glancing up at him under her lashes. "Something strong?" He chuckled and nodded, moving to make a drink.

"Rough day, huh?" he asked casually though he knew it obviously had been.

"You've no idea—thanks," she said while taking the drink from where he'd just placed it in front of her.

"I'm a great listener," he pressed. She gave a small laugh and took a sip.

"Mm I'm sure you are." She looked up to meet his eyes, smiling briefly. "I'm really just passing through- I gave um…someone a ride, but I'm headed back home after this." Killian narrowed his gaze while he wiped the counter again, his eyes never leaving hers.

"Who?" He wasn't going to lie- he was curious.

"Just some kid, I'm sure you don't know him," she answered. Killian lifted the corner of his lips, his eyebrows raised. No way the kid found her that fast.

"Let me guess- long lost son?" he wondered out loud. He watched her bright green eyes widen and he leaned forward to press his forearms into the dark wood bar. "Why don't we stop assuming I don't know things, hmm?" he said, a smirk playing at his lips. She rolled her eyes, a laugh escaping.

"How the hell do you know him?" she asked. He shrugged, shaking his head slightly and biting his lip.

"Wandered in one day. Cute kid, by the way." Her cheeks flushed with a light color, making his smirk grow wider.

"Of course he did. And um, thanks I guess?" Killian smiled at her answer- she'd quirked a brow as she spoke and leaned in slightly while thanking him.

"You're welcome." He paused. "Look, because and _only_ because I know the kid- why are you really here? Because if you're really just going to leave him…" he said, shaking his head. This kid had talked about meeting his birth mom for so long.

"I don't know what I'm doing yet," she said quietly. "I have my reasons for giving him up you know."

Killian nodded. He assumed she did, but it was still hard for him to accept. No one deserved to be left alone, wondering why their parents walked out. He still had dreams of his father leaving- he couldn't even imagine what Henry went through; it had to be even worse knowing neither parent wanted you at all. "What's your name, lass?" he asked suddenly. He watched as she narrowed her stare before looking down at the table, her arms now folded on the bar to match his, their bodies much closer now.

Her eyes flickered back up to his, a smirk playing at her lips, their previous conversation forgotten. "Wouldn't you like to know," she taunted, her voice quiet. Killian's eyebrows shot up in surprise, not really expecting her answer.

"I would actually," he confirmed.

"Who's asking?" Oh, she was good. Alright, he thought. I'll give her this one.

"Killian Jones, milady. Now, you are?" he asked again, extending his hand. She eyed it while biting her lip, contemplating her answer.

"You'll have to earn that knowledge, Mr. Jones," she said, struggling to hide a grin. He laughed at her, pushing off the counter to grab a few shot glasses. "Oh no you don't," she warned. Killian looked at her questioningly. "You think getting me drunk will make it easier to get my name. I got news for you- it won't work."

"Well," he started, moving towards her once more. "I do love a challenge." She gave him a laugh, rolling her eyes while gripping the bar's edge. "What am I to call you, if your name is such privileged information?"

She thought for a moment, her pointer finger resting at her chin in thought. "Swan. You can call me Swan."

Killian chuckled- "Swan? Really?"

"It's my last name genius. Like I said- you've gotta earn the first name," she told him before pushing off the stool and standing. "Thanks for the drink," she added.

"Anytime, Swan. And don't worry about it- it's on the house; though I _am_ curious as to where you're hiding the money..." She laughed and gave him a wink, turning to leave. He watched her leave, somewhat fascinated in the way she moved. He'd have to find the kid himself and ask for her name, he supposed; though he quite enjoyed their little game.

* * *

Killian picked up the mug Granny had placed in front of him, thanking her. He took a small sip, testing the temperature of the hot chocolate- he preferred the taste to coffee, a beverage he hadn't even encountered until his twenties when he moved here from London, and never really grew accustomed to it. He licked his upper lip to rid it of any whipped cream that might have found its way there, and nearly dropped the mug when he looked up.

"Thought you were skipping town, Miss Swan," he said just loud enough to get her attention- and unfortunately, the attention of Granny and her lovely granddaughter Ruby, who both stared at him in confusion. Emma, however, just laughed and dropped her arms to her sides while shaking her head to the side.

"Of course _you're_ here. Someone convinced me to stay, if you must know," she told him as she made her way to the stools he sat at, taking a seat one chair away from him.

"My, Swan I'm flattered," he said, resting his hand over his heart. She rolled her eyes and ordered a hot chocolate- "Can I get some cinnamon on that, too?"- before addressing him.

"Not _you_. God, you're conceited in the mornings," she mocked, though there was something behind her words that made him think she was lying.

"Aye and you're a real piece of work yourself," he countered. She rolled her eyes- something he was beginning to think was just a normal character trait of hers. "Cinnamon?" he asked when the mug was put in front of her.

"Huh?" she asked, glancing at him in confusion. Someone's a bit slow today.

"The hot cocoa- you have cinnamon on it?"

"Oh! Um…yeah- kind of an old habit I guess." She took a sip of the drink and wiped the cream off her lip. "When I was growing up there was this old place I'd go to with this really nice waitress. The first time I'd gone there it was snowing and freezing, so she put some hot chocolate in front of me. I'd never had it before, but she promised I'd like it. I wasn't so sure, so she said she'd put some magic in it to make it extra good- she sprinkled cinnamon on it. I've never really liked it without it," she said in an honest moment. Killian looked at her in wonder- who _was_ she? "What?" she asked.

"Nothing. Just…nothing. How's it?" He motioned to the drink.

"Amazing- here," she said while extending the mug to him. He lifted his eyebrows in question. "Oh come on, it's not like you have cooties." He laughed and took the mug, taking a small sip before widening his eyes.

"Damn," he said.

"Yeah I know- good right?" she said with a smile. He nodded in agreement, turning around to find Granny. Ruby found him instead.

"Here," she said with a wink as she sprinkled some of the 'magic' cinnamon over his own mug, bending over the bar and looking at him like she was attempting to undress him with her eyes.

"Thank you, love," he said, giving her a grin just to see what would happen. Ruby always flirted with the customers- no one was ever really safe. She merely glanced at Swan and sighed, turning away from him to get back to work.

"Is she always like that?" Emma asked curiously. He laughed, giving her a nod before taking a drink of his hot cocoa. It really was good. "Wait- you're drinking hot chocolate, too? Why? It's sort of uncommon in the mornings," she wondered.

"Grew up in England, love. Never liked coffee, and tea is…well I don't care for tea so much either," he told her. She seemed to accept this, as she nodded thoughtfully and looked down at her cup.

"When'd you come to the states?"

"I was 22," he answered, suddenly lost in memories of that first summer and her eyes…

"—Hello?" Emma asked, pulling him from his mind. He hadn't realized she'd been talking.

"Sorry," he said.

"It's fine," she told him, eyeing him with a look he couldn't quite decipher. "I was just wondering what made you move…" Oh, great. Where to start with that one…

"Um…it's actually somewhat of a long story," he started. "I'd an opportunity to come here with a friend of mine, and I took it."

"Doesn't sound like a long story to me," she replied. He gave a short laugh and drank some more of his cocoa.

"That's the short version," he said. Then he smirked, looking back to her and saying, "You have to _earn_ the long story." She started laughing and soon he was too, only to be interrupted by the bell on the door ringing and a boy's voice filling the air around them.

"Okay but I don't _need_ a babysitter!" he exclaimed. Killian chuckled and turned around, knowing what he would find. Henry was exasperated, backpack slung over his right shoulder as he scolded the sheriff who, coincidently, wore a similar expression Killian did.

"Yeah yeah, I know- take it up with your mother," he said while hiding a smile. Emma had turned around at the sound of Henry's voice and it didn't take long for the boy to meet her gaze.

"Mom!" Emma sighed, glancing at Killian.

"I told you not to call me that." Killian perked up ever so slightly, but Emma noticed. A knowing smirk fluttered to his lips as he thought he might actually get to find out her name. "But I guess it's alright," she added quickly. Killian's shoulders slumped and he glared at her, though he found it difficult to when she shifted her eyes to his with a knowing smirk of her own.

"Yeah….well," Henry said, clearly picking up on the body language. "_Regina_," he spat, "is making Graham babysit me 'till I get to school. I told you she doesn't trust me!" he cried. Emma gave a tight lipped smile to the kid and stood to meet him.

"Sorry, kid. Can't help you there," she told him while ruffling his hair. Killian watched from his seat as the boy ran over to him, taking the seat his mother had skipped in favor of one farther away from Killian's.

"Hey you met my mom!" He seemed very excited.

"Aye- she won't tell me her name though, only that I'm to call her Swan. I see where you get that stubbornness, lad," he told him, tapping his chest when he said 'you.'

"Oh! Well her name's-"

"Henry!" He looked to his mother innocently and she shook her head, a smile threatening to show.

"Fine." He turned back to Killian, asking how they managed to meet. Emma gave him a warning look, and he laughed. Apparently 'she wandered into my bar looking to get trashed after a long day' wasn't an acceptable answer, and somehow she'd known he'd say something along those lines. Well, two could play that game.

"Well, _naturally_ she came onto me the second she saw me but-"

"Oh please," she said. "In your dreams." He wagged his eyebrows at her and she rolled her eyes, turning towards the sheriff to introduce herself. Killian strained to hear her name, but the kid was talking awfully loud.

"She probably found your bar huh? Well anyway, Regina doesn't want me talking to her. That's why Graham is watching me. I don't know why though- it's not like meeting er, Swan, is going to make me hate Regina more. I don't think that's possible really," he said. Killian shook his head at the kid when he adopted the name Killian was told to use. God, this family…

"Well, Miss Swan I've actually got a job opening- if you're interested that is. It's a bit of a long term thing though, so if you _do_ intend on skipping town soon I'd request you pass," Graham told Emma. Killian watched as she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smiled at him.

"Well, what kind of job is it, Sheriff Humbert?" Oh God. He seriously wished he could tease her right now- it was blatantly obvious she was attracted to him.

Graham smirked, looking briefly to Killian. They'd been good friends since Killian opened the bar- there had been a surprising amount of calls to the cops from his bar, so they'd gotten to know each other. Killian nodded, as if to assure him that he had no intention of chasing after her. Sure, Swan was gorgeous, but he was in no position to actually make a move. He wasn't sure he'd ever be ready to make a move on anyone, actually. Not after…

"It's deputy. My last one just moved so I'm a bit short staffed, seeing as it's only me," he told Emma.

"Yeah, actually that'd be great. I was a bounty hunter back in Boston, so I know how the system works- at least a little," she told him, all business now. Bounty hunter, huh?

"Hello- earth to Killian! Are you even listening to me?" Henry asked.

"What? Sorry kid. Something about Gracie?" he guessed. It was a solid guess- Henry'd been talking about this girl in his class for the past two weeks. She was the daughter of a man Killian knew quite well- he frequented the bar.

"Yeah. Well, yesterday she dropped her pencil and asked me if I could get it for her. So I said, it'll cost you. And she was like, okay what do you want? So I said I don't know you'll figure something out, because I didn't wanna be too obvious you know? So then she just leaned over and kissed my cheek! She kissed my cheek, Killian! What am I supposed to do when I see her in class?" he asked, arms outstretched in question. Killian laughed, patting the boy on his back. They grow up so fast.

"Well, you can pretend like it didn't happen- or- you can tell her how you feel." He nodded, taking his hot chocolate to go, and hopped off the stool.

"Thanks! Hey Mom, so does this mean you're gonna stay in town?" he asked as he approached Emma's side.

"Yeah, kid. I'm going to stay." Killian couldn't help but smile. It'd been a long time since he'd had a friend like her- one who'd call him out and challenge him. Graham was good, but he also wasn't that great to look at- not when compared to Swan that's for sure. Killian stood as well, greeting the sheriff on his way out, waving goodbye to Emma and Henry who stood at the doorway. "I'll see you around," she called after him.

"You'd better if you want to hear the rest of that story," he replied with a smile.

* * *

**A/N: Review? :D**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: This chapter was fin to write! Fun fact- I didn't go to sleep last night...instead I wrote...thankfully I crashed this afternoon and was able to edit it with a clear head. Those of you who've read my main story Dream Of Me may remember what happens when I write severely sleep deprived...We end up with things that I did NOT intend on happening meaning some of the Killian/Emma interaction in this particular chapter...lol Hope you enjoy! This chapter is really setting the backdrop of the story I'll be telling of the inevitable love triangle between Emma, Graham, and Killian. **

_Now they're going to bed_

_And my stomach is sick_

_And it's all in my head_

Emma spent the rest of the day in her little beat up bug. She drove to Boston to pack up her belongings- there wasn't much, and she usually kept it pretty packed up anyway; she wasn't one to stay in a single place long. Her neighbor came by to see if she was okay and eventually helped once Emma explained herself. She was a nice woman; one Emma had always thought would be like her own mom. Not that she would ever know for sure.

When she arrived back in Storybrooke she began looking for apartments, but couldn't find any. She wandered into the dinner once again, sipping hot cocoa and smiling at her previous encounter in this place. Ruby was nice enough, making small talk with her. "So, what's with you and Killian?" she asked.

Emma nearly spilt her drink in her haste, looking up to the woman in shock. "N-nothing. Why?" Ruby smirked like she had the biggest secret in the world and leaned in a little.

"Oh, nothing. It's just- he's a _great_ kisser, in case you were wondering," she said with a sly wink. Emma felt her cheeks flush, though she wasn't entirely sure why. Ruby turned and walked back to the counter to refill Emma's drink, and returned with a key. Emma's eyes widened, trying to figure out what was happening. "I saw you sleeping in your car last night. Here- my granny owns the motel here. You look like you could use a decent night's sleep before work tomorrow- by the way, Graham? Not so bad himself." Emma gave a short laugh, unable to control it.

"Um, thanks. Did you um, did you date…them?" Emma asked- she couldn't stop the curiosity from bubbling up to the surface. She had to know.

"Uh, not _really_. Graham and I went out on a date or two- but that was _way_ back when he first moved here, like 7 years ago. Ancient history, if you ask me. He's a little too much of a 'good guy' for me- I like 'em bad. But Killian…now that's a good story. I think it was actually his first week here? I can't really know for sure. But he…well let's just say he likes his rum and it goes to his head sometimes," she said with a laugh. "I never had a relationship with either of them. But by the looks of it, they've both got their eyes on _you_," she added. Emma looked down, working out Ruby's words in her mind. By the time she'd come up with a question for the outgoing waitress, she'd already left her side. Ruby was gorgeous- Emma couldn't really blame the men for going after her. But she sensed there was much more to both stories than the woman was letting on. Emma wasn't quite sure if she'd left things out on purpose or what, but it was nagging at the back of her mind.

Emma sighed and left, going to her new home in the small hotel that Ruby so kindly gave her the key to. She pulled the few boxes into the room and collapsed on the bed, hands over her eyes. This was her life now. There was no going back, especially now that she'd accepted a job and promised Henry she'd stay. Her instincts to run were starting to present themselves but she shoved them down inside her, refusing to give in. She fell asleep easily enough and dreamt of a past she desperately wished she could forget.

* * *

"Sheriff?" Emma called out as she peered around the corner inside the police station. She wasn't sure what time she should show up, so she guessed 7. The sheriff's office was practically all glass, so she could see in easily once she was in the main room. Graham sat at his desk, his head in his hand while talking into the phone. Emma watched him from the entrance into the larger room, wondering what was happening and if it was official police business or not.

His hand moved around his head and scratched the back of his neck, his curly hair messing along the way. A small smirk broke his lips before shaking his head and making some sort of motion with his hand as he spoke quietly, Emma only hearing mumbles. Emma noticed the desk placed in the room she stood in, and realized it was the deputy's. She walked over to it and placed her bag on it before walking back to the entrance to hang up her red jacket. Graham's voice carried then; he'd raised it with his statement- it didn't help his case that the door was left open a bit, letting sound out.

"I won't keep doing this- it's not right." Emma's brows pulled together in confusion, but she knew she shouldn't be listening anyway so she tried to drown it out.

His voice was loud though, especially now. "No, I'm not saying that. What I'm saying—Regina, come on! I mean, we've been doing this how long? And Henry isn't a little kid anymore…" His voice drifted away as he looked up and noticed Emma. He froze, his hand touching his forehead gently and his eyes wide, staring straight at Emma. She swallowed, trying to work through what she'd just overheard. "I've got to go," he said distractedly before hanging up, his eyes never leaving hers. He tried a smile but it didn't look particularly genuine. Emma managed to tear her eyes from his in an attempt to slow her heart rate. He had beautiful eyes- she couldn't deny that- and they held her captive even from this distance.

She stared at the file on her desk, looking carefully at the pages but not really reading. It was some dispute about land or something, but all Emma was thinking about was the fact that Graham's footsteps were coming closer. "Hey, didn't see you come in," he said.

She glanced up with a smile, replying, "I only just got here. Been pretty busy looking at this file." He seemed to buy it, although Emma knew he wasn't naïve and was aware she'd heard every word of his conversation. He didn't say anything about it though. "By the way- what is this even about?"

He gave her a laugh, leaning over to pick it up while sitting on the edge of her desk. She looked up at him while he read it over, noticing the light stubble and the subtle way his lips shifted to show a sort of smile, though he wasn't actually smiling at all. "You know, it's rude to stare," he said, biting his lip to hide the smile that Emma realized had been forming before her very eyes. He glanced at her, his smile giving it away that he wasn't actually offended that she was, in fact, staring.

That didn't stop Emma from turning light pink. "I wasn't staring," she lied. He chuckled and placed the file on her desk, walking away from her to get a cup of coffee.

"Hmm, I think you were," he teased. God, that accent…What was it with men in this town and accents? His forehead scrunched up when he looked back at her. "Want some?" he asked, gesturing to the mug in his hand.

"Um sure," she replied. Instead of making him bring it to her, she stood and walked over to him to take it herself. He turned, not expecting her to be near him and nearly dropped the mug all over her, spilling some on the ground. "Sorry!" she said. His eyes widened and he laughed, giving her the full cup and turned to refill the other before wiping up the remnants of the coffee from the floor.

"A warning would've been nice," he said casually. "Though I _am_ impressed you managed to sneak up on me." _Twice_, Emma thought.

"I wasn't trying to sneak up on you," Emma scoffed. "Not my fault if you're not attentive, _Sheriff_. By the way- you might wanna work on that," she added with a smile.

"_Oh_, you're going to be fun around the office, aren't you?" he laughed. She watched him pick up a folding chair and bring it to her desk to sit next to her but facing the other direction so he could stretch his legs. He looked over to her and asked if she even read the file.

"Yes," she assured him. He smiled a little wider and looked down at the papers and back up to her. "Not…exactly. But I am now," she corrected herself, picking up the first page and skimming it. "I don't see what the problem is though. It's clearly this family's land- why is it even a problem?"

"Because technically it's Gold's land," he said while taking the paper from her hands, his skin grazing hers briefly and shooting butterflies into Emma's stomach- this was ridiculous, what was she, 13? "He owns most of the town."

"But…they bought it from him-"

"They leased it. He still owns it if they break contract," he told her.

"Okay, so how'd they break the contract?"

"Exactly. Gold claims they did, but the tenants claim they didn't do anything wrong." They agreed that Gold might have some evidence of his own that he hasn't shared yet, and they decided they should go out and question him.

The spent roughly an hour out talking to Gold before returning to file the necessary paperwork to prove that Gold had in fact given them what they needed to prove the couple had breached their contract. It was silly; they'd gotten a few fish and the contract said "no pets". Thankfully it was only a small fine they had to pay him- they didn't lose the house or anything.

They broke for lunch, Graham insisting he paid for food at Granny's in honor of Emma's first day. She agreed and the two set out to the diner in his cop car.

"So, Emma- what's it like to meet your son after 10 years?" he asked when Ruby brought them their drinks. She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and he watched with a small smile.

"Weird." She looked up and laughed at his expression- he'd rolled his eyes and was looking at her as if to say, "well _yeah_." She took a sip of her hot chocolate and looked back at him. "It's different. I um…" She struggled with what to say next, but decided if she was really going to lay down some roots here she ought to open up to someone. And it felt right, that it'd be him she opened up to. "I'm an orphan. So I've kind of struggled with giving him up for the past 10 years. I always wondered what happened to him…It's good to see that he didn't end up like me." Graham's eye brows laid low against his eyes and he reached over to lay a tentative hand on hers.

"Sorry. I was given up as well. I was fortunate to grow up with a family though. I can't even imagine what it would have been like if I hadn't," he told her. She looked up to his eyes and felt her stomach turn. The compassion behind his gaze was not something she was used to. "He's lucky to have found you," he told her while pulling his hand back. She missed it instantly.

"Yeah, I'm not so sure. His mom sure disagrees." Then she remembered his earlier phone call and looked down, wondering if she'd just made things awkward.

"Regina…she just wants what's best for him. Right now she's having a hard time considering the option that maybe that means she isn't the right person to be raising him," he told her. Emma noticed the way his voice changed when he said her name, almost as if he was conflicted.

"Well she's more fit to raise him than I am."

"I'm not so sure," he said. Ruby came then, placing their burgers in front of them and giving Emma a wink and glancing over at Graham. Emma's eyes widened slightly and she looked down, hoping he didn't see that. "Anyway, I know he's happy to have you around. He's been trying to find you for quite some time. Guess finding people is hereditary, huh?" he asked with a smile.

"Ha, yes guess so," she replied. She wasn't sure why she felt the need to deflect the question, but she did.

"What made you start? Was it your parents?" he pressed.

"Uh...I don't really know," she answered honestly. She'd always been curious about them but she hadn't really started looking for people until, well until Neal. "I guess they might have had something to do with it," she added.

"Well, you're rather good at it anyway." The two ate in almost silence, the only conversation was small talk about work and how Emma liked town. When they finished they walked out to the car, Graham opening her door for her.

"Thanks, but you don't need to-" His face lifted, a smile touching his lips as he listened. "Right. Well, thanks." She got in and pulled the seatbelt over her shoulder as he sat down and started the car.

"Can I ask you something?" Emma looked at him.

"Yeah, shoot," she said. He licked his lips and stared at the road.

"Where's Henry's father?" Emma took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She did not want to talk about this. "Sorry- you don't need to answer that."

"No it's fine…I actually have no idea. He kind of, um…"

"Emma, really- I shouldn't have asked. It's none of my business." She sighed, somewhat grateful yet wondering what he'd say if she told him.

"He left me," she whispered. Graham glanced over to her, concern etched across his face.

"How long ago?" Apparently he wasn't concerned with it not being his business anymore.

"10 years. He never even knew I was pregnant." Emma had no idea what made her open up to him, but she felt as if 10 years of weight had just fallen off her shoulders.

"Oh…has, um…I mean have you…been in any- serious relationships…since then?" Emma could tell he was slightly uncomfortable asking, as he was staring at the road as if his life depended on it. Why did he care- wasn't he screwing Regina? At least that's the impression Emma had gotten from his phone call.

"No," she stated. She didn't feel like spilling her life story to him, but sadly was headed straight for that path. He already knew more about her than most people she'd encountered.

He nodded, and they sat in silence until they reached the station. They walked in and set their coats on the rack before Graham's face scrunched up and he looked at Emma. "Is there any chance I can get you to run the afternoon patrol?"

Emma smiled, thankful for a distraction from him. He was starting to make her open up, and she wasn't sure how she felt about that. It scared her. And he was gorgeous- who knew what she'd end up telling him while looking into his eyes? "Yeah, sure. Do I get to drive the car?" she asked, looking pointedly at the keys in his hand with a small smirk. He laughed and threw them at her, Emma catching them easily.

"Knock yourself out. Call if you run into trouble," he told her before turning to enter his office. She took that as her queue to leave.

She drove around for the amount of time he'd told her as she'd left the building, staying out a little longer to watch Henry as he got off the school bus and walked home with a little girl. She wondered if it was the one he'd told Killian about. When she arrived back at the station to gather her things to leave, she heard Graham on the phone yet again. He should really learn to close the door- and talk a little softer.

"Regina...it's not that I don't want to. It's one thing when he isn't home- it's another thing entirely when he is! When he was younger he wouldn't have thought anything of it, but what happens if he wakes up? He's not stupid, he's going to know exactly what's happening—Well what do you want me to say?" He paused and ran his hand threw his hair. "It doesn't feel right. It's not like we're actually dating either; we're just—no I _know_ that he'll be asleep-" Emma had heard enough. She didn't need to hear anything else to understand exactly what was going on. It started making sense…

"_Well she's more fit to raise him than I am." _

"_I'm not so sure," he said._

Suddenly Emma felt sick to her stomach and she dropped the keys on her desk loudly, causing Graham's head to snap up. They exchanged a glance, Emma shaking her head with a look of disgust before picking up her purse and leaving.

She ignored him calling after her.

She ran out to her car, hopping in and driving to the mayor's house as fast as she could. She saw Henry at the doorway, about to walk inside when he saw her. "Emma!" he shouted when she got out of the car.

"Hey kid. Want to go to your castle?" she asked him. He'd mentioned it earlier and how he wanted to take her there.

"Sure! Just hold on." He opened the door and shouted up to his mom. "I'm going to the castle with a friend! Be back before dinner!" Then he closed the door and practically skipped back to Emma's bug with her….

"How was work?" he asked, legs dangling over the edge of the little castle that was in a way his second home.

Emma looked at him and smiled, trying to get the mental image of Regina and Graham _together_ out of her head. "It was good." He lifted an eyebrow and smirked. God could this kid be any more hers and Neal's?

"Really? How was working with Graham?" he said suggestively. Emma shook her head, fighting a laugh; was Henry really trying to set his mom up with Graham? If only he knew how ironic that was…

"It was…interesting," she answered honestly. He gave her a knowing smile and looked over the playground. The two talked and joked for awhile about school and Emma's adventures chasing after criminals for her previous job before Emma began getting calls from Regina, which she ignored- she was afraid what she might say if she talked to the woman, and with Henry by her side she couldn't risk it. When Graham called, she broke down. Of fucking course she'd make him call.

"What do you want?" she said into the phone while stepping away from Henry.

"Um…you okay?" he asked, taking in her tone of voice.

"Just…what do you want? Did Regina put you up to this?" She was irritated and she wasn't afraid to take it out on him. For whatever reason she took Graham sleeping with Henry's mom extremely personal.

"No- well, yes, but-"

"Look, I don't want her to worry about him but given what I found out today can you really blame me for wanting to take him out for a bit?" she asked bitterly. She could hear him sigh on the other line, and a mumbled voice in the background. "Oh my God- you're with her right now aren't you?"

"Emma-" he sighed.

"No, you know what? Call me when the two of you are done and I'll bring him home. I'll see you tomorrow." Then she hung up, walking back to Henry who she was quickly beginning to think of as her son, and not just some kid who she gave birth to.

It took 3 minutes for Graham to call back, which Emma ignored and instead texted him, saying, I'm on my way.

She drove straight to The Hook after dropping Henry off.

"Hey stranger," Killian greeted her with a smirk as he wiped down a table before walking back to the bar. She stormed over to one of the stools and sat down, glaring at him. "Um…something strong?" he asked cautiously, not wanting to upset her further.

"What do you think?" He raised his eye brows and made a sort of sigh, turning to pour her some whiskey. When he placed it in front of her she downed it in one go, and his eyes widened, wondering what the hell happened. "What?" she asked irritably.

"Nothing," he said casually while shaking his head and looking at the bar. "It's just…" he glanced up. "You want to talk about it?" he asked while refilling her drink.

"No." He nodded in acknowledgment of her answer and instead elected to use this time to get to know his mysterious Swan better. Emma, on the other hand, was still fairly pissed off and didn't particularly want to talk to him. Though, if she didn't want to talk to him, why did she feel drawn to the bar in the first place?

"So, Swan, tell me- What happened to you to make you this way?" She was already pissed off; he might as well ask any and all questions he knew would make her upset while she already was.

"Excuse me?" She looked at him as if he was crazy, and in this moment she had to seriously consider whether he was or not. Who the hell did he think he was?

"You heard me. You shut people out. Hell, you won't even tell me your _name_! Now you saunter in here as if you've had the day from hell itself and refuse to talk about it though we _both_ know you want to, and you have the audacity to take your anger out on me, all the while putting up walls to make it harder for me to get to know you and understand your anger in the first place- _why_?" he spat out. If he was going to ask the hard questions, he was going to go all out. He'd been curious why she seemed a little guarded in their previous encounters, and he was going to find out why if it killed him. He raised a brow at her in question, his hands placed on the bar somewhat far away so his arms were only slightly bent as he leaned forward towards her, his breath dancing on her face.

"Fuck you," she threw back.

"_Fuck me_- now there's an idea." It was crossing a line, but he didn't really care. She was starting to piss him off, and he had other customers he needed to be cheery for. He walked off to refill someone's beer and listened to her complain. Emma tried to fight off the shiver that ran down her spine then, cursing herself for being so affected and telling herself it was only the accent that had an effect on her.

"_Real_ mature. Not even in your _dreams_, Killian."

"Well you can't very well control my dreams now can you?" Okay, so he was really just asking for it now. He couldn't help it- she made him so angry. She was completely infuriating and he wanted to get back at her for putting him in a bad mood. _Not because you want to see the blush on her cheeks_, he thought. "Get off your fucking high horse and grow up," he sneered.

"Grow up?" She flat out laughed in his face. "Please! Maybe you're too busy being a man child, owning your little bar and what not to notice that you're entirely too old to be throwing out stupid innuendos for it to be considered endearing- if anyone needs to grow up here it's you, telling me I should fuck you? Are you serious?!"

"Hey! You walked right into that one, love. Perhaps your subconscious is trying to speak up, eh?" he taunted, throwing a dark smirk at her while she glared. Killian refused to let her words sting him. He didn't need to grow up. He grew up already, and found out it sucked. So he opened a bar to retreat back to an earlier version of himself before all the pain and confusion. But he didn't tell her this.

"Why did I even come here?!" she shouted. She knew the answer, but she didn't want to admit it. She liked Killian's company. He was a good person for her to be around and she'd hoped being near him tonight might make her forget about Graham. Which, coincidently he had with his antics.

"I don't know, princess. Why did you come here? Was it simply to piss me off?" he said from across the room. There weren't many people in here at this hour, but those who were certainly were staring.

"Forget it," she said, standing to walk away. She made it about half way to the door before he started after her, meeting her as her hand turned the door handle, Killian's hand slamming the door shut. "What the hell!"

"Swan," he said, shaking his head and sighing. He closed his eyes briefly and then stared at her eagerly, trying to convey some thought he wasn't sure even existed in his conscious mind. "Don't go," he pleaded as his voice deflated. Emma walked back to the bar, uncomfortable with how close he'd been standing and wondering why he'd sounded so…pained when he asked her to stay. He put a new drink in front of her and took a shot of rum for himself to steady his hands from their earlier confrontation. After a few minutes of letting each other cool off, he mumbled, "I'm sorry."

Emma let out a short laugh and forced a smile that he saw through immediately. "Yeah well…I kind of deserved it." He lifted an eyebrow and smirked, Emma rolling her. "I was being an ass and I'm sorry." Killian was surprised she'd apologized- it seemed almost foreign to her as well.

"Apology accepted…. But you never answered my question," he said, looking at the bar to avoid her eyes, knowing he might be starting a whole new fight but curious enough that he didn't care.

Emma surprised him and sighed, telling him she was going to need another drink if she was going to answer that. He obliged and she took a sip before fixing her gaze on the dark patterns the wood made in the bar. "I was abandoned as a kid," she started. Killian dropped the rag from his hand and felt his breath catch in his throat. "My parents gave me up, and the only real family that ever took me in gave me up when they got pregnant- I don't even remember them really. My childhood consisted of foster homes and state houses, never staying one place for long. I never had any friends, I never had any family…When I was 16 I left the system and learned to fend for myself. Two years later I met this guy…" she paused. Emma felt herself breaking inside; she'd already told him a lot. He didn't really need to know about _him_. She looked up to find Killian's gaze was fixed on her, his face torn as if the story were about him, not her.

"Henry's father," he helped her. She nodded then took another sip of her drink, fearing what she'd find if she looked back into his eyes.

Emma decided she wasn't ready to spill that particular part of her life. "I guess growing up alone made me guarded… I never learned how to _be_ open. Walls became a part of my life as much as air and water…After…Henry's father…it just got worse. At least up until that point I was capable of imagining what life would be like with someone else…" Emma hadn't even noticed she'd begun crying until Killian reached over and swiped the tear from her cheek, his thumb lingering just a second too long. Emma looked into his deep blue eyes and realized if she continued there would be no going back. And she wasn't sure she wanted that; not yet, not necessarily with him. "Graham is screwing Regina," she said abruptly. Killian's eyes widened and his brows shot up as he let out all the air in his lungs in one quick puff. Emma didn't really know why she said it; maybe she was deflecting, who knew.

She was probably deflecting.

But what she did know was that for whatever reason Killian wanted to know what made her who she was, and no one had ever tried to do that. In one day she'd managed to spill the secrets of her childhood to one man and a bit of the story of Neal to another. Since when was she so open? These men were clearly messing with her head- but she wasn't sure that was a bad thing. The bad thing was that there was more than one guy drawing her out of her shell, and that scared her.

"How, uh…Are you serious?" he asked once he found his voice.

"Yep." He looked at her with his bright blue eyes, confusion scattered in them. "I heard him talking to her about their relationship on the phone twice today."

Killian rubbed his hand across his face. Wow. How had he not known- he was _friends_ with Graham. And Killian _knew_ Graham was interested in Emma- he'd seen the look in his eyes when he'd met her. What the hell was he doing- stringing her along? For, _the mayor?_ Was he _crazy_? "Jesus," he managed. "They don't uh…I mean, not with Henry there…"

Emma lifted her eyes to his and he scrunched up his face in horror. "That's disgusting," he said simply. Emma couldn't hide the small smile from her lips- this, this was why she'd come here. Because she knew Killian was similar to her, and would understand.

"No kidding. I'm actually still trying to get the image out of my head-"

"Oh God!" he exclaimed, pushing the palms of his hands against his eyes. "Why would you even say that!"

"So I don't have to suffer alone," she said as if it were obvious. Which it kind of was. She swallowed the rest of her drink and reached around Killian to grab the rum he'd poured for himself. She filled her glass with a little- she wasn't one for rum, but hey it was sitting right there calling out to her. She made a face when she took a sip, but it wasn't so bad after the second.

"Thanks _so_ much," he said with as much sarcasm as he could manage, taking the bottle from where it sat in front of her and pouring himself another shot before downing it. He moved around the place to fill up anyone's drink's that needed filling before returning to her side, sitting on the barstool next to her. There were only 3 other people inside, and Killian knew none of them would be spreading this gossip around town- that is if they'd even heard it- because they really didn't bother with the other townsfolk. "So is that why you were so upset?" he asked her.

"Yeah," she nodded. "Can you blame me?" she asked with a side glance at him. His bottom lip lifted slightly and he shook his head, fighting a smirk.

"No. Not at all," he replied. "That's really messed up." Emma slipped the last of the rum she'd poured for herself down her throat and focused on the burn instead of the intensity of Killian's stare which burned into the side of her head. "Henry's lucky to have found you," he whispered. Emma turned to him slowly, remembering Graham telling her the same thing earlier.

"Thanks." They sat there, looking at each other, for another minute before Killian broke free to walk to the other side of the bar.

"I'm glad you decided to stay," he told her. She looked up and smiled- a real genuine smile.

"Me too."

* * *

**A/N: Review? I'm already working on the next chapter, but reviews keep me going! :D**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This one has lot's of feels. You get to see why killian acted the way he did in the previous chapter, and you get to see Emma opening up- and consequently, the love triangle begins. **

_gotta be down_

_because i want it all_

Killian made his way to the diner the next morning, hoping to find Swan. He'd really enjoyed their talk the previous night- even the fight to be honest; it kept him on his toes. When he walked in she was already seated with Henry, both giggling about something or another. He nodded towards Emma and she smiled, Henry calling out to him.

"Killian! Sit with us!" he commanded rather than invited. Killian laughed and went to sit by them, making eye contact with Ruby hoping she'd take it as a hint that he'd want something to drink.

"Hey, kid," he said with a smile, then looking across the booth at Emma. She looked at him a little differently than she ever had before, but Killian wasn't sure what it meant. Ruby came over to ask what he wanted, and gave him a flirtatious wink before leaving. Even after all these years, he still knew that girl could get him into some serious trouble.

"Sleep well, darling?" he asked Emma. She looked up at him, her gaze narrowing.

"Yeah. How about you- did you have sweet dreams?" she asked with a wicked smirk. Killian found it hard to breathe suddenly, his eyes refusing to tear away from hers as his mind drifted back to their fight last night when she'd told him "not even in your dreams"….

"Oh yes," he replied coolly. He had in fact dreamt of her, but not in that way. Now it was her turn to be frozen in place, Henry looking between the two of them with an exasperated expression.

"Oh-_kay_. I'm gonna go to the bathroom…" he said, pushing Killian so he could get out. He managed to slip out of the booth before the kid could shove him out and smirked back at Emma.

"Some kid you got there," he said. She laughed, relieved their tension was gone now.

He slid back into his seat, adjusting his legs to get comfortable before accidently kicking her. "Hey buddy watch it," she said with a kick of her own.

"Here you go," Ruby said while placing a mug in front of Killian.

"Thanks lass." He picked it up and took a sip, looking up in confusion when Emma began laughing. "What?" he asked self consciously.

"You, uh, you got a little something," she said while motioning to her nose. Blasted cream. He wiped it away quickly, glaring at her while she smirked.

"What are you doing tonight?" he asked suddenly. Might as well ask, while he still had the courage to. She lifted an eyebrow, looking at him curiously.

"Killian Jones, are you asking me out on a date?" she wondered out loud. He smirked and leaned towards her.

"God, you're conceited in the mornings," he teased, echoing the very same thing she'd told him only a few days ago.

"Funny guy," she said not amused.

He sighed and said, "I'm _not_ asking you out on a date, Swan. I simply would like to hang out with you while I'm _not_ working. We can still drink, if you'd prefer," he added with a smirk.

"Sounds like a date," she said again. Gods, if was going to be a date she would damn well know it.

"It's not- Look, you don't know me particularly well so I'll let it slide, but for future reference you should know- I usually only date woman whose names I _know_," he said while raising his eyebrows and taking a drink. She gave him a little fuck you smile and looked up to see Henry walking towards them. Killian slid over so the kid could sit on the outside of the booth, strategically placing himself more directly in front of Emma.

"Just as friends?" she asked cautiously, Henry looking between them and wondering what he missed.

"Scout's honor," he promised. She laughed and agreed.

"Only if I have time though. I can meet you at The Hook around 6 if you want," she said. Henry was asking what was happening, so Killian filled him in that his mother was going to spend some time with him tonight.

"Like a date?" he asked. Emma started laughing, clutching her side to support herself when she saw Killian's exasperated expression.

"No! God, what is it with this family?" he asked somewhat to himself.

"Come on kid, you need to get to school and I have work. See you later, Killian," she said while standing, motioning for Henry to follow suit. Killian watched the two leave and shook his head, wondering why everyone thought this was a date.

* * *

Emma sat down at her desk and sipped her coffee, looking at the papers scattered on her desk absentmindedly. She heard Graham come in and resisted the urge to roll her eyes when his footsteps approached her. She smelled something sweet though, and turned her head to find him standing at the edge of her desk, smiling, with a box of fresh doughnuts in his hands. He flipped the cover up to reveal them and looked down at her.

"What, are you trying to buy me off with food?" she asked while reaching in to take a bear claw.

"Sometimes the clichés are true." Emma smiled and took a bite. "I'm sorry about yesterday. I shouldn't have been on the phone with her at work." Emma glanced up to meet his gaze, chewing her doughnut carefully before swallowing. Right to the point with this one, huh?

"There's more than one thing you shouldn't have done," she said casually. He closed the doughnut box and sighed, moving to kneel next to her chair so they were at eye level.

"Emma, please-"

"It's okay. You don't need to explain yourself to me," she told him. His eyes bore into hers and she felt her heart pick up a beat at their intensity.

"It means nothing," he told her while shaking his head. "And I'm going to end it. It's not right and I know it," he added.

"Graham- its fine!" she lied while standing to refill her coffee. He stood and walked after her. "You're grown adults- you can do whatever you want. You don't have to tell me this," she assured him.

"You're upset." It wasn't a question, and he was absolutely right. She sighed and looked down at the coffee pot, refusing to look at him. She could feel him walking towards her as if they were connected, and Emma closed her eyes.

Graham touched her arms gently, willing her to turn but she wouldn't. "_I'm sorry_. I should have told you, I mean you're Henry's mom, and…"

"And what? And I should know the woman he lives with screws the sheriff while he's asleep?" she said harshly as she turned to face him finally, moving away from him and toward her desk.

"Emma, it's not like that!"

"Are you sure? Because that is exactly what it sounded like yesterday." She took a deep breath and looked at him. He looked tortured. Emma knew she should let it go- it's not like she really had any place in getting involved. "Sorry. Look…can we just….forget about it?" she asked quietly. He nodded and left the room in favor of his office.

The rest of the morning was silent, neither daring to speak to the other, both wondering if the other was upset. Emma couldn't help but feel a tab bit betrayed, but she also didn't really know why. Graham could do whatever- or rather, whoever- he wanted. It was none of her business.

So why did she feel like a ton of bricks was holding her down?

"You wanna get some lunch- or am I still in trouble?" Emma turned her head to see him standing a few feet behind her, leaning against the wall to her left. His hands were in his pockets and he wore a small smile. Emma sighed and returned his smile, closed the folder on her desk, and stood.

"You're not in trouble, Graham." She thought for a moment before adding, "I'm sorry I overreacted."

"Emma- no. You don't need to apologize." She nodded and walked over to him, reaching around his body to grab her coat- he was effectively blocking it from her. She pulled it on before adjusting her hair and looking at him.

"You ready?" she asked.

"Yep- shall we?" he said while extending his arm out to show the way to the door, letting her go first.

The drive to the diner was quick and the silence was filled by the radio. The two walked inside and sat down, Ruby taking their orders quickly.

"Okay, so…tell me something."

"Like what?" Emma asked. Graham shifted where he sat and smiled at the table, his arms resting on the table with his hands clasped.

"What were you like as a child?" he asked, his eyes lifting to catch hers. Emma looked to the ceiling as if an idea for her answer were written there, and then returned his gaze with a smile.

"Stubborn."

Graham gave her a laugh and shook his head. "Oh I bet. You were that one who never let anyone else win an argument, huh?"

"Please- if they could have won, they would have. Not my fault I was always right," she answered with a sarcastic tone. Emma looked down at the table then, suddenly lost in a memory. "It got me into trouble a lot, though."

Graham took on a look of concern. "How?"

Emma swallowed before answering him. "I got in fights a lot. They had to keep moving me to different schools…But, you know, there are only so many places I could go in the system. They weren't exactly thrilled to drive one kid to one school, and everyone else to a different one."

"Emma- I'm sorry I asked-"

"Don't be," she said quickly, looking up to him. "It's in the past- really Graham it's fine," she assured him.

"Okay…I don't want you to feel like you have to tell me anything," he told her.

"I don't. But- it's your turn. What were you like?"

"Oh God…let's see…I was quite annoying actually." Emma laughed and he broke into a smirk. "I'm serious! If you'd have met me you'd roll your pretty eyes at everything I'd say," he said, his elbows still perched on the table but one hand lifted towards Emma, his finger pointing at her when he spoke. Emma glanced up at him, surprised by his hidden complement.

She tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and smirked. "You couldn't have been that bad."

"I was though."

"How exactly were you annoying? Because annoying could mean many things," Emma said.

"Well, I suppose to the other kids I wasn't _that_ bad. But I had this tendency to pretend I knew everything…and I've always loved animals, so this one summer I decided- oh God I can't believe I'm actually telling you this-"

"Oh well you _have_ to tell me now," Emma said excitedly. He rolled his eyes and glared at her playfully.

"I decided I wanted to be a wolf, so, for an entire summer, I went around pretending to be a one."

Emma bit her lip to keep from giggling. "Like…all the time, that entire summer-"

"Even when we went to a store," he said with his head in his hand.

"That's adorable," Emma said with a soft laugh.

"It's embarrassing is what it is!" Ruby came then, placing their food down in front of them.

"What's embarrassing?" she asked, shooting a look of curiosity at Emma.

"Nothing- absolutely nothing," Graham said a bit too quickly. Emma let out a quiet laugh and nibbled on a fry as Ruby mumbled something along the lines of "You're no fun" and left. "Your turn- you owe me an embarrassing story," he informed her.

"Seriously?" Emma asked. He raised his eye brows and took a bite of his burger, his eyes staying on her as if she wouldn't tell him if he looked away..

"Mhmm," he mumbled. Emma tried to come up with something that wouldn't completely horrify herself.

"Oh, okay I got one. Remember how I told you I was really stubborn?"

"Yes," he answered. God he was enjoying this way too much. He was like a kid on the way to the zoo or something, all anxious and excited.

She rolled her eyes at his amusement. "Well, when I was little- probably about the age when you were a wolf-"

"I'm never living that down, am I?"

"Nope. Anyway, I was walking home from school with a few of the other kids from the home I was living in then, and there was this little boy who was following us. Now, we were all girls- it was an all girls home we lived in. There was no reason for this kid to follow us when we all knew he didn't live at our home. But every time I turned around he'd look to the side or up at the sky, so I knew it was me he was watching."

"This is your embarrassing story? That you had boys chasing after you even as a young child?"

"_No._ Be patient… so we're walking right and we get closer and closer to home and becomes blatantly apparent that he's following us. So…" Emma sighed. "So I turn around and yell, 'Why are you following me?' and he just kind of stood there and stared at me, so I said, 'stop following me it's weird.' So he walked away…now this happened everyday for about a week. And everyday I'd tell him to leave. But one day, I was particularly annoyed with him so I turn around and say, 'Hey you! I told you to stop following me!' and then…Ugh…then I walked right up to him and slapped him, so he'd get the point that I meant business, and he just came right back and kissed me!"

Graham was laughing now, a mental image having formed itself into his mind. "It's not funny- I was horrified! And to make it better, afterwards he ran away, and the next day at school everyone thought we were 'dating.'"

"_That's adorable_," he said with a smirk. Emma glared at him and threw a French fry in his direction before laughing herself when he dodged it with a look of surprise that she'd actually had the guts to throw something at him.

"Shut up, wolfie," she teased.

The rest of lunch went similarly; they ate and joked while telling stories. By the end, Regina was a distant memory in both of their heads, Emma wondering desperately why she couldn't stop smiling at him. When their knees had brushed under the table gently, Emma could have sworn her face turned red- which was odd, Emma was not one to get flustered over a guy- but Graham never looked at her differently or teased her. When they'd finished eating, he'd walked her to her side of the cop car and opened the door for her. This time Emma didn't question it.

Back at the station, Graham pulled up a chair to her desk to work. He sat on the other side of it, and every now and then one of them would catch the other staring. They talked a little- it was a slow day; hell, every day was a slow day. He even resorted to asking if she wanted to play a game of cards- which Emma won- and then they were back to asking random questions to pass the time.

"What was your favorite disney princess?" Graham asked. Emma laughed and looked at him funny.

"_What_?"

"You heard me- every girl has a favorite- don't pretend you don't."

Emma rolled her eyes. "I didn't actually. I was Snow White for Halloween once, but I never really related to any of them. I wasn't a princess girl- I was more into Peter Pan than anything," she answered.

"You're kidding- which side were you on? Pirates or lost boys?"

"Well…Okay, I'm really going to sound dorky here, but just know I thought about this a lot growing up. It was my favorite story…I don't think there's much difference between the two to be honest. I think Captain Hook was just as lost as the lost boys, and who's to say Peter is all innocent? I think they all have a little lost boy _and_ pirate in them all." Graham thought this over before a wicked smile hit his lips.

"Alright, I see where you're coming from. But if this was your favorite story, then you must've seen yourself in it somewhere. Where we you, when you'd imagine yourself in the story? On the ship, or on the island?"

Emma scrunched up her face, trying to find an answer that wouldn't make her sound pathetic. The truth was, she'd always seen herself getting whisked away by Peter Pan to a magical land. It was her dream really- she didn't have a family after all. She'd fit right in. But when she'd gotten a little older, old enough to read into the original story and play, she realized she really liked the Hook character in every version she read. Peter was great in his own way, but Emma really didn't like the idea of living with a bunch of kids who were just as empty inside as she was. She wanted more.

She still wanted more.

And that was why Captain Hook had appealed to her. He always had these grand adventures, and he was mysterious and just enough of a lost boy that Emma could relate to him, but he'd also grown from that. Emma always wondered what he would have been like if the stories were true.

"I don't know. I saw myself on both. It just depended." That would do. Graham seemed to accept this, nodding his head in appreciation. He seemed to sense that there was more to be told, but not that she wanted to tell. He backed off the subject and moved onto topics that didn't involve their pasts- things like favorite food, movies, music, etc. By the time it came time to clock out Emma almost didn't want to go. She enjoyed talking to Graham- it was comfortable and nice. But she also knew that she needed to meet Killian soon.

"I should get going," Emma said.

"Yeah, me too. Hey, Emma?" She looked up at him, admiring the way he could twitch his lips a centimeter and it all of a sudden appeared like he was smiling at a secret. "I had a lot of fun today," he said. Emma grinned.

"Me too. You're not so bad," she said with a playful shove against his shoulder.

"Neither are you," he said with a smile. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Yeah," Emma replied. Suddenly she was acutely aware of how close they were standing, her heart fluttering in recognition. For a moment she thought he might kiss her, but when he didn't she scolded herself. He had Regina. He didn't need Emma.

* * *

Emma paced her room, wondering why she agreed to meet Killian tonight. It was a lot less stressful when she just wondered into his bar for a drink. She decided to change her clothes- why, she couldn't really say- so now she was freaking out over what was acceptable to wear on this 'non date.'

"This is stupid," she grumbled. She decided she was just going to pick something and then be done with it. Who cares what she looked like anyway? She grabbed a pair of dark skinny jeans and a simple loose black top. She pulled on some boots and her red jacket over it and decided it would do. She went over to her mirror to touch up her makeup and curls- hey, might as well look presentable-and then she was ready…..for whatever this was.

She elected to walk- she thought some fresh air would do her some good. The walk wasn't terribly long, but it did give her time to clear her head. When she finally made it to The Hook, she walked in slowly, glancing around the room for him.

Killian looked up from his beer when the door opened, and stood quickly- almost in shock- when he saw her. She wasn't wearing anything special, not really, but he'd only seen her after a hard day when she needed something to take the edge off. Today was different. She looked like she had even gotten _ready_ to come see him. When he caught her eyes she smiled and walked over to him. "Don't you look pretty, love," he said with a smile of his own.

"Thanks, I guess," she said while tucking her hair behind her ears. "So…what exactly are we going to do…" He laughed at her expression- she looked somewhat afraid of what his answer would be.

"Whatever you'd like. We can even stay here if you want. Doesn't really matter- I figured you'd _probably_ end up here tonight anyway; I just thought maybe this time I wouldn't have to be serving drinks while we talked." Emma nodded- it made sense- but she heard a dig in there.

"Are you implying I have a drinking problem?" she asked in mock horror.

"Well you've been in town how many days? And how many of those days have you _not_ come to the bar? You either really like the booze love or it's the company you enjoy," he said with a glint in his eye, a smirk playing at his lips.

"What if I actually had a drinking problem? You wouldn't be so funny then," she pointed out. He shrugged his shoulders and sat back down to take a drink of his beer.

"Please, you don't have a problem. If you did, you'd have ordered much more to drink each night. I'm a bartender, darling. We tend to be quite adept at sorting out the alcoholics from the casual drinker." He looked up to her. "Besides, I'm fairly certain you keep coming back for me, not the drinks," he said with another smirk. Emma gave him a smile that was anything but sweet, and then grabbed his beer from where he'd sat it down in front of him, and took a long drink from it. "What the hell!" he exclaimed, trying to take it from her, though she turned to keep it from him.

"Don't be so sure of yourself buddy," she told him while passing the cup back, significantly more empty.

"That wasn't very nice," he said. She shrugged in response and sat down in the stool next to him, looking down at the ground.

"I was thirsty," she said.

"Mmm, yeah I'm sure that was why you did it." He finished the drink off and turned to face her fully. "So, Swan- how was your day?"

When she looked up at him he wore a serious expression, and Emma knew immediately what he was wondering about. "It was good. He um…I talked to him about it," she said in reference to Graham.

"And everything's okay now?" he asked skeptically. She nodded, and Killian could tell by the look in her eyes that she was being honest. "That's good. I know it upset you," he said.

"Yeah…Can I ask you something?"

"Of course."

"I know why _I_ was angry- Henry's my son…and I get that you agreed it was sort of messed up but…"

"But why I react so strongly if it didn't concern me?" She nodded. Killian took a deep breath and ran his hand through his hair and across his face, turning to face the bar. He knew she'd ask. This morning when she didn't, he thought he might have dodged a bullet, but he couldn't avoid the topic forever. After last night, he knew it was inevitable she found out. "You sure you want to know- it's a bit of a long story," he warned.

"The same long story you said I had to earn?" she asked. He'd almost forgotten about that.

"In a way…it's part of that story."

"I want to hear it. If you're okay to tell it," she said quietly.

He nodded and looked down at the bar. "I guess it started when I was about 8…my dad started staying late at work, going on business trips…He'd never been around much anyway, and when he was he didn't bother to get to know me but he was my dad, you know? Anyway, he drifted away from us until one day, he just never came home…My mum told me he was on a trip, but at night I'd hear her crying, trying to call him. After about a month I just started to accept that I didn't have a dad anymore, and I dealt with it. It was hard, it was _so fucking hard to just let go_…but I did. My mum wasn't so lucky. She blamed herself- but how could she not? She hated that I didn't have a father, and all of a sudden she had to work two jobs and take extra shifts where she could just to pay for food and rent…we moved and I think that's when things really went downhill. We couldn't afford the old place- I was maybe 10 now. We'd held on to the old place as long as we could but there was only so much money in the savings account…" Killian paused to take a deep breath.

He'd never told anyone this. Hell, he'd never even told _her_. "I did what I could to help but I was still awfully young to get a job. She got really depressed and I think she started drinking around then…About a year later she started doing drugs, and I remember sometimes finding her sprawled out on the couch after stumbling in at horrid hours in the morning…When I was 12 she changed. I was so happy because we finally had money to buy me clothes, and she started dating again," he said with a laugh that was more of a scoff than anything else. Emma had the urge to comfort him, fearing where this story was headed. Even if this was the worst of it, he had a horrible childhood, just like her. "Only she wasn't dating. I was young, I didn't catch on at first…the kids at school started saying things but I never listened. Sometimes I guess the guys couldn't take her home with them- probably had wives- and so she'd bring them over really late while I was asleep. I don't know when she started bringing them over or how long it went on for…I was 13 the first time I caught her. I was horrified to say the least when I went into the kitchen to find my mother cozying up to a man twice her age by the looks of it. Thank God I didn't see much of anything but still…I tried to forget, tried to ignore it, but a few months later it happened again…On my 14th birthday I remember she left my party early for a 'work thing' which, by this time, I'd learned what kind of work it was for." Emma reached out and touched his shoulder, his gaze shifting to her hand as she dropped it to his, curling her fingers around his palm and rubbing circles on the back of his hand. Killian closed his eyes for a moment, knowing he didn't really need to go on but he wanted to. He wanted her to know everything about him.

"The next day I skipped school and slept in. She was pretty upset, but I didn't really care. She told me that I couldn't just not go to school and throw my future away. She was yelling and she was still wearing the dress she'd worn the night before and she kind of smelled like vodka…And I just went off on her. I'd never yelled so much in my life. I told her everything I'd kept bottled up, every little thing. I told her she had no right to talk to me about throwing my future away when the only reason I was able to go to a good school was because she sold herself to middle aged men with bad hair and deadbeat lives. She um…she said if I didn't respect her I could leave. So I did. I packed my bags, right there in front of her while she apologized. But she was right- I couldn't live there when I knew what she was doing. She wasn't my mum anymore. She'd barely even spoken to me in over a year and I had no interest in sitting by as she ruined her life. I lived with a lad I'd known for years until I graduated, then I traveled a bit. Never stayed in one place long. But then when I was 22 that same friend came to me, telling me he was moving to America and asked if I wanted to tag along. I'd been living in Surrey for a little less than a year already so I agreed- thought it'd be an adventure. So…there ya have it. Both stories in one," he finished with a sigh. Emma's hand was still on his and he looked down to it, turning his hand over carefully and lacing his fingers through hers.

Emma felt the sudden urge to pull back, run away from him and the things he'd told her, the way he was holding her hand…but she didn't. "I am so sorry, Killian," she said. "I can't even imagine…" She shook her head and glanced down at their hands.

"Yeah well…you had your own childhood horrors I can't even begin to fathom. My parents were fucked up but at least I had parents…"

"Still. Killian just because you had parents doesn't make what you went through easier than what I went through….God I never should have told you about Graham-"

"Why?" he asked. Emma felt like telling him about Regina and Graham only brought back bad memories. She didn't want to be responsible for reminding him of any sort of pain in his life. "Love, it's fine you told me. I may have overreacted a tad- I know it's not the same thing- but I am glad that you told me. That you felt comfortable enough to tell me." Emma suddenly felt his eyes on her, and she felt a bit self conscious. She wasn't really sure where this was leading, but she was sure she needed fresh air. Now.

"Let's get out of here," she said. He didn't answer right away, so she looked up under her lashes to see him staring.

"And go where?" His voice was quiet and curious, the pain that had previously flooded it while he told his story expertly masked.

"I know a place," she told him. The corners of his lips tilted up and he agreed. Emma slipped her hand out of his and stood, Killian following suit, both _almost_ regretting the lost contact from their hands.

"What is this little place of yours, may I ask?" They were outside now, and Emma felt immensely better. She had begun to feel claustrophobic inside under his watchful gaze.

"I bet if I gave you a few guesses you'd get it. Keep in mind- I don't know many places around town and my tour guild is a 10 year old kid." Killian thought for a moment and smiled, thinking there was only one place.

"The castle?" he asked.

"Bingo," she replied. A moment passed with silence, but it wasn't the least bit awkward. The only reason they broke it was because Killian couldn't help but ask her a question.

"Am I going to hear your story now that I've told you mine?"

"I already told you my story," she said, looking to him in confusion.

"Ah, but it wasn't the full story. And I still don't know your name, love," he reminded.

"Maybe when we get there," she told him. She was a little anxious to tell him about Neal, but she knew that it would be good to finally talk about it after all this time. And after what he'd told her, she felt like she could trust him.

The walk was silent from then on, but once they reached the edge of the children's park, Emma spoke up. "Race you?"

"Are you serious?" Killian asked in shock. She was kidding- right?

"One….."

"My God, you're serious."

"Two…"

"Fine- but don't think I'm going to let you win-"

"Three!" They broke off in a sprint, a nice break from the heavy conversation that had weighed on them both. They were neck and neck almost the entire way until the very end when Killian pulled ahead, touching the slide a few seconds before her.

"I do believe I won- what's my prize?" he asked breathlessly with a smirk.

"Shut up! You cheated- I don't know how but you did." She shoved his shoulder and pulled herself up onto the top deck to dangle her feet over the edge, Killian looking up at her.

"Don't hate the player, Swan," he said while he grabbed onto the wooden rail to pull himself up as well.

"I'll hate the player if I want-" she began. Her sentence was cut short when she realized how close he was. The gap they were sitting in was just large enough for the both of them and a few inches, leaving him incredibly close. While this made Emma slightly uncomfortable, it made Killian's heart flutter like a little schoolboy, and he wondered what the hell was happening to him.

"Tell you what- my prize can be your story," he said, still a little out of breath. Emma rolled her eyes and looked out at the woods.

"How about this- you ask me a question about my past and I'll answer. I think I told you most of my story already, so this will work better." This was kind of a big deal for Emma- giving someone the power to make her spill her darkest secrets. She didn't let just anyone have this opportunity, and Killian sensed as much.

"I want to know what happened with the lad's father," he said quietly. He couldn't help it- a part of him just needed to know because maybe, just maybe, she'd understand the part of his past he'd left out- the part about _her_. Emma sighed and shifted a little before looking at him, then quickly looking down.

"Right for the kill, huh?" He smiled a little, though she didn't see. "I met him when I was 18. His name's Neal…I uh…look don't judge me, okay?" she begged with a glance at him.

His brows laid low against his eyes and he shook his head slightly. "Never," he promised.

"Okay…Well, I already told you I was living on my own, fending for myself…I kind did whatever I have to in order to live…one day I saw this old beet up VW Bug and broke in. He was in the backseat- apparently I wasn't the only one with the bright idea to steal the old car. The whole relationship was kind of messed up in the sense that we stole our way through cities and towns to survive- I don't know if I ever really loved him or if I just loved the high I got when we were together." Emma seemed lost in thought for a moment before continuing. "Anyway, it got to the point where we were tired of always running…we agreed to move to Tallahassee after one last job. He was wanted for some watches he'd stolen, and the evidence the cops needed to put him away was tucked away in a locker at a train station. So I volunteered to get it- they didn't know who I was after all- and it went off okay. He gave me one of the watches and we agreed on a place to meet after he fenced them. I waited for him longer than I should have…I was stupid. A cop showed up instead of him that night, which wouldn't have been a big deal- not really; I'd lied to cops before, I could've pretended I didn't know anything about the watches if I needed to. But he said that Neal sold me out, and that's when it hit me. It didn't matter if I could escape this cop- I had nothing to go back to. I had _nothing_, if not Neal." Emma ran a shaky hand over her face and took a deep breath. It was in the past- it didn't matter anymore.

Much like she had when he told his story, Killian placed his hand on her knee. "I'd completely forgotten- I was still wearing the watch he'd given me. I was arrested right there, still shocked that Neal had left me like that. I spent 11 months in prison." Emma let out a sarcastic laugh. "The best part is, I found out I was pregnant in my cell. I never had a chance. The prison I was in had this program for women like me- I had the option to have Henry in prison and raise him there for up to a year- plenty of time for me considering my sentence was 11 months- but what was I supposed to do with a kid? I didn't know how to raise a child- hell _I_ was practically a child! I was in no position to raise him once I made it out of jail either- I didn't have a job and I had no one who would help like some other women. I knew if I kept him, he'd have a horrible life. Sure, he might have a mom which was more than I could say for myself, but he wouldn't have anything else. So I decided to give him up. There was an agency they had me work with- he was to be given to a family right after he was born, so I knew he'd at least have that. His chances at a good life increased drastically when I signed those forms…I got one letter from Neal while I was in jail, but that was the only contact we've had since. To be honest I want nothing to do with him, even if he showed back up in my life. I moved past it, and he doesn't have any power over me anymore."

Killian squeezed her knee and then put his arm around her to pull her close. She was hesitant at first but then leaned into his embrace, her head falling on to his shoulder. Killian fought the urge to kiss her head, and wondered why he wanted to in the first place. What was happening to him? He hadn't felt _anything_ for _anyone_ since Milah. So why now? What was making him want her close, wanting her to fall into his arms and let go? He pushed the thoughts to the back of his mind and told himself it was just because he wanted to offer some comfort that he'd pulled her so close, that he'd wished so desperately he could put a smile on her face right now.

"So that's my story," she said softly, her voice low and raw with emotion.

"You realize that you're incredible, don't you?" he said suddenly, looking down at her. Her eyes lifted his in confusion. "You don't…What you went through- that betrayal and the way you've moved past it- darling I wish I had that strength," he said quietly.

Emma shifted so she could look at him better, her face torn. "What's wrong?" she asked. "What aren't you saying?"

This was one of those moments that changed the course of your life, and Killian knew that. If he told this girl about Milah, if he opened up like that, their relationship would never be the same. He knew she would inevitably look at him differently, and he wasn't sure he was ready to talk about it. It'd been years since he'd seen _her_, but she still haunted his dreams and thoughts. He'd never told anyone what happened. Not even Charlie, his mate that brought him to the states and witnessed his relationship with her, knew what went down those last few days. Telling the woman before him of the heartache he'd endured, well it might break him farther.

But it might fix him.

"Killian?" He looked at her.

"Her name…her name was _Milah_," he said almost too quietly for Emma to hear. He hadn't spoken her name since that night, and it nearly broke on his lips. "It was a very long time ago…"

"What happened?" Emma asked gently. Killian shook his head, fighting with himself on whether he should tell her more, while looking around at the vacant park.

"It's a rather long story, love."

"I've got time," she answered.

Killian cracked a smile and nodded. He was just going to suck it up and tell her- he was a grown man for crying out loud; there was no reason he should be afraid to tell her. "I'd been in the states for a few months, and my mate Charlie wanted to go to this club one night. That was the first time I'd seen her. I wanted to ask her to dance, but she had this stream of guys around her. Couldn't blame them really, she was beautiful…She had these eyes that could hold you in place a mile away and a smile that literally could make you fall in love right then and there…" He closed his eyes and leaned forward, his elbows resting on his knees and holding his head up. Emma placed her hand on his back, making Killian's heart jump. "About a week later I saw her again at the same place. She was alone this time, sipping a drink at the bar. Charlie made fun of me for being a coward and I decided I'd rather be shut down by her than be mocked by him for the rest of my life…We talked for hours, about absolutely nothing at all. By the end of the night I knew I had to see her again. We started meeting around the city at different bistros and coffee houses, taking whatever time we could to see each other. Being with her, it consumed me. All she'd have to do was call me and I was already reaching for keys and my wallet to go see her before hitting answer. There wasn't a day we spent apart that summer…"

Killian let out a shaky breath and glanced at Emma. "I loved her more than I thought one man was capable of," he admitted. "But then I found out her secret. She was married, and she had a son- no more than 3 I believe. The two had taken some trip to Europe to visit his family but she'd decided to stay home- apparently they'd been having problems and she just needed space. I was already so taken with her that I didn't mind, telling her it didn't matter. We kept seeing each other discreetly, never within a mile of her home and always in places she knew her husband would never enter. One day I realized I wanted more, wanted to be with her anywhere and everywhere to show her off to the world as the love of my life. When I'd asked her if she intended on leaving her husband, she'd all but laughed. 'I have a son, Killian. You don't expect me to abandon him do you?' she'd asked. I felt guilty for even wondering, but it was never the same after that. I began questioning what we were doing, what it all meant to her, if anything at all. I believe it was a night in October- the first snowfall of the year- when she'd showed up to our date completely flustered. She'd had a spat with her husband before coming, and as it turned out he'd grown suspicious of her cheating. He'd followed her, with his _son_ no less, and came billowing into the bar we were drinking at. He started yelling, mainly at me, for ruining their family. I remember all I could think about was the way their child stood behind his father, staring at me while tears streamed down his cheeks-" Killian had to pause to take a breath.

He could still see the look in Bae's eyes.

"She told him to stop shouting, that he was scaring Bae and that she didn't want him seeing this. It went on for awhile before she finally grabbed the boy's hand and led him out of the place, leaving me with her husband. It was like the air got sucked out of the room with all the sound, and then we were fighting. I don't know who threw the first punch but it didn't matter much. The owner had to call the cops on us- he thought one of us would end up dead. He probably wasn't far off to be honest…I tried calling her the next day, but she didn't pick up. Almost a week went by before I heard from her. She asked if she could come over, but I wasn't anywhere near prepared for what happened…I made dinner for her but she wasn't interested in eating- I guess she'd had another fight with her husband and needed a _distraction_- I'll never know. She kissed me, and I'd missed her so much that I didn't question why she hadn't even said hello… keep in mind I was only 22, and I really didn't have a clue what I wanted with my life- but I knew I wanted _her_…Anyway, later that night I asked if she was okay after what happened at the bar, and she told me things were pretty rough. She said that she and her husband had decided they needed to take a trip to get their minds off the whole mess, and that's when it clicked. She had no intention to end things with him. She had every intention to end things with _me_." Emma's hand on his back slid around his shoulders until she held him in half embrace, her head back against his shoulder. To her it wasn't that intimate a gesture- she merely meant it as a friendly offering of comfort to someone who was clearly hurting. Killian didn't see it that way though. He thought maybe, just maybe, she was thinking about him the same way he'd begun to think about her.

"I'm so sorry, Killian," she whispered.

"Not your fault, lass-"

"Emma." He looked at her with wide eyes. She smiled and moved her arm, repositioning herself to rest against the post to she could look at him more clearly- while inadvertently placing space between them. "My name is Emma," she told him.

Killian was already somewhat emotional from all the confessing he'd done today, but this just topped it off. For some reason, her telling him her name was extremely important to their friendship. It meant Emma was finally letting someone in, and it meant he was that someone.

Unfortunately, neither saw it as quite the same thing. Emma saw Killian as a friend- a best friend even- but just that. She'd been consumed with the blind hope that something might happen with Graham and hadn't even allowed herself to consider the attractive bartender as anything more than simply a friend- mostly because when they'd first met he'd had heartbreak written all over him and she wanted nothing to do with that. Killian, however, found himself wishing she'd come closer, wishing he could kiss her. He realized right then and there that he was falling for this girl, and that he was in trouble. He hadn't felt this way in a long time, and it scared him.

"_Emma_," he whispered, almost reverently, before smiling at her. "It's nice to meet you, Emma," he said jokingly while extending his hand.

Emma laughed and shook his hand, saying, "Nice to meet you, Killian." The gesture was sort of their way of letting the other know that they accepted each other for their pasts and faults. In that moment, both let go of the things that had haunted them for so long.

And both moved on.

* * *

**A/N: Review? :) I'll give you a hint for the next chapter- something big happens *evil laugh***


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